


What He's Doing Now

by Nomme_dePlume



Series: Wanderer [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Dai-nana-han | Team 7 Dynamics (Naruto), F/M, M/M, POV Second Person, Pining, Songfic, Vignette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-23
Updated: 2020-05-23
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:01:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24340237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nomme_dePlume/pseuds/Nomme_dePlume
Summary: The thought burns, as if his hand is slicing through you again. Your heart clenches, your teeth clench, your fists clench, and your eyes sting – familiar feelings that make you feel like you’re twelve again, and he’s leaving for the first time. Like you’re seventeen, and he’s leaving again. Always leaving you behind.
Relationships: Haruno Sakura/Uchiha Sasuke, Uchiha Sasuke/Uzumaki Naruto
Series: Wanderer [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1757230
Comments: 5
Kudos: 28





	What He's Doing Now

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to my new series - Wanderer. It's going to be several stories inspired by some of my favorite country songs (because country music moves my _soul_ ) that never fail to remind me of Team 7 - mostly how Naruto and Sakura react (in a divergent canon universe, of course) to Sasuke's search for redemption and subsequent (second) absence, with some Sasuke introspectives thrown in. I will absolutely ignore 700 and Boruto, and it will absolutely end NaruSasu. But I can't do canon without dealing appropriately with Sakura, so... yeah. Also, they will be labeled "songfic," but they will not in any big way incorporate the lyrics (unless a line is important) or be a retelling of the original song story, for the most part. I'm just using the overall mood and meaning to tell a separate story. Thanks for checking it out!

There’s a storm moving toward the village. It’s easily felt in the air, making it heavy and dense and sticky. It’s almost unbearably hot, even in the dead of night. The village is nearly silent, the only sound that of the flickering streetlights and singing crickets. The horizon lights up from a flash of lightning, and your thoughts go immediately and inevitably, unerringly and inexorably to _him_.

You laugh softly to yourself. When do your thoughts _not_ go to him? Even your friends have pointed it out, as the weeks turned to months turned to years that he’s been gone, and you have increasing moments of inward reflection. _Obsession_ , they call it, and maybe they’re right. But you have no problem with it. Because it’s him. Because it’s love.

The lightning strikes again in the distance, and you wonder if it’s raining wherever he is. Is he safe? Does he have enough supplies? What is he doing at this very moment?

You wonder – you _hope_ – that he sometimes thinks about you. And then your thoughts turn bitter, tearing him down for being selfish, going off on his own, leaving you behind _again_. But in the same thought – the same _breath_ – you tear your _self_ down for being selfish and wanting him to stay. After everything, he deserves whatever brings him peace. You know this; it pulses in your _viscera_ , it’s so inherently known – that he deserves peace. Even if he can’t find it by your side.

The thought _burns_ , as if his hand is slicing through you again. Your heart clenches, your teeth clench, your fists clench, and your eyes sting – familiar feelings that make you feel like you’re twelve again, and he’s leaving for the first time. Like you’re seventeen, and he’s leaving again. Always leaving you behind.

Right now, you’d give anything to think of something else. Maybe it’s the idleness of lying in bed and not being able to sleep, with the storm gathering thickly outside and suffocating you with the oppressive heat. So, with a decisiveness that has defined who you are in the latter years, you tear yourself out of bed and hop through your open window and up to the rooftops.

It’s still hot up here, but now the sweat gathering on your brow and the small of your back feels earned as you jump aimlessly from roof to roof, the concentration you’re purposefully giving to the chakra balance on the balls of your feet helping you to not think about him, even when another flash of lightning lights up the sky.

And yet, even in this brief moment when your mind is _not_ thinking of him, your body automatically brings you to the only thing in the village left of him – him and his family, the ghostly and rotting ruins of the Uchiha district. It had sustained just as much damage as the rest of the village during the Akatsuki invasion, but no one had done anything to clean it up, yourself included, and you ache again. 

After a brief pause, you slowly inch your way forward, into the dark recesses of the – surely – haunted ruins. But there is only quiet and the soft echoes of your footfalls. No ghosts, no wind moaning through the hollowed-out wrecks that were once homes, not even the very faintest trace of him. Only oppressive heat and silence and your pulsing heartbeat.

This place doesn’t remember the Uchiha clan. It doesn’t grieve for their passing or pine for its lost son. It’s nothingness and calm, ready for a rebirth that no one has given any thought to. Except maybe him, and maybe that’s why he has stayed away. Because he literally has nothing here.

Except you.

At least, _you_ know he has you. But as each new year passes that he doesn’t return, leaving you to your thoughts and wondering and pining and longing – you wonder if _he_ knows he has you.

You had thought he did. You thought that something special and meaningful had passed between you when he left this last time with faint, vague assurances that he’d be back. Eventually. But it’s a dream that’s moving further and further away, with each growing length of time between the letters that he sends, with no word – not even a hint – of when he might be back or even just drop in.

A flash of lightning splits the sky, much closer than previously, followed by a loud, grumbling clash of thunder that sounds like it’s right on top of you and must be a signal for the clouds to release their deluge. Curtains of lukewarm rain drench you in seconds and obscure your vision, and it’s excuse enough to turn your back on the abandoned district – like so many have before – and return home. 

There’s a puddle of water at your feet when you slip back through your open window, and you barely give it any notice as you trek to a pile of towels and leave a trail of water behind you. You rub a clean towel over your body and hair as you walk back toward the window, and when you’ve pushed it closed, you kneel to quickly wipe up as much of the water as you can with the towel and leave the rest to dry on its own.

You make a quick detour to the bathroom and toss the wet towel and your wet clothes into the laundry hamper. And you decide against a fresh set of clothes because it’s still hot and you’re still wet and dirty, so you simply slip back into bed and hope sleep finds you this time.

Except it doesn’t, and you toss and turn and watch the rain pelt against the window and the lightning split the sky and, eventually, the sun rise behind the dark clouds. You haul yourself out of bed to shower and start your day, bone weary and distracted because no matter how hard you tried you spent all night thinking about him.

And you’re sure that, even with your planned daily activities that will keep your mind occupied and focused for a large part of the day, there will be moments – as there always have been and probably always will be, until he returns to you – that you’ll pause and think and wonder what he’s doing now.

Owari

**Author's Note:**

> This first installment is based on Garth Brook's [“What She’s Doing Now.”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQMrGi8cgo0) I chose second POV (something I don't think I've ever done before) because this is supposed to leave you wondering who the narrator actually is. Is it Naruto or Sakura or both? Hopefully, it comes across that these are thoughts and actions that both characters could claim. And the "he" referenced throughout is always Sasuke. I hope you enjoyed this new thing I'm trying! Thanks for reading!
> 
> Lyrics:  
>  _Last time I saw her, it was turning colder  
>  But that was years ago  
> Last I heard, she had moved to Boulder  
> But where she's now I don't know  
> But there's something about this time of year  
> That spins my head around  
> Takes me back, makes me wonder  
> What's she doing now?_
> 
> _'Cause what she's doing now is tearing me apart  
>  Filling up my mind and emptying my heart  
> I can hear her call each time the cold wind blows  
> And I wonder if she knows  
> What she's doing now_
> 
> _Just for laughs, I dialed her old number  
>  But no one knew her name  
> Hung up the phone, sat there and wondered  
> If she'd ever done the same  
> I took a walk in the evening wind  
> To clear my head somehow  
> But tonight, I lie here thinking  
> What's she doing now?_
> 
> _'Cause what she's doing now is tearing me apart  
>  Filling up my mind and emptying my heart  
> I can hear her call each time the cold wind blows  
> And I wonder if she knows_
> 
> _That what she's doing now is tearing me apart  
>  Filling up my mind and emptying my heart  
> I can hear her call each time the cold wind blows  
> And I wonder if she knows  
> What she's doing now_


End file.
